You know what I think is absolutely ridiculous? (No, Rachel, please go on) I think autographs are probably like the most useless piece of crap since like the fucking student council constitution. A kind young lady was telling me today about how when she was in New York she saw Gerard fucking Way. She described a scene in which basically hoards of people were vying for autographs. Later, I thought to myself, what the hell are you going to do with a autograph? Answer: create a new source of clean energy.
Autographs don't really prove anything, people sign random shit all the time. Teachers sign hall passes, people sign checks, I sign receipts. Sometimes people sign things as *gasp* other people. Sure, it's call forgery and is rather illegal. But it's possible. All, I'm saying, is that when Gerard goes to Starbucks, buys 5 Lite Green Tea Frappacinos, pays with his credit card, signs his receipt (as is customary is most western countries) and BAM you have Cajun linguini. NO. Just kidding. I meant, BAM you have a autograph.
And do you know how many little chillins scan autographs into their computers and post them on the internet? Answer: 94565469.4 Basically, all I'm trying to say, is that autographs are easily forged. I remember, when I was in Disney Land (World), way back when I was still a naive fetus (too short to ride Space Mountain...not much has changed), I remember meeting all the famous characters. I was about three apples high (as is customary in most western countries) running around with this stupid red autograph collecting book. Needless to say, I was pretty siked. But alas, my dreams were dashed, as I noticed that the characters were not authentically signing my book, but rather stamping it. STAMPING IT. Now, okay, I forgave the Ninja Turtles, because obvs they cannot hold a pen, as they are turtles. But, I mean, Jasmine, come on! What a skank!
I think, what I'm trying to get at, is that next time you see Gerard Way, you should probs punch him in the face and steal his credit cards. Or, conversely, ask for a picture with him, because, the photograph is proof (I know you know). Additionally, if you happen to see any one of the Ninja Turtles, I would appreciate it if you called me or at least sent a txt message.
Okay, now let's not talk about this again, or the fallacies in this argument.
Autographs don't really prove anything, people sign random shit all the time. Teachers sign hall passes, people sign checks, I sign receipts. Sometimes people sign things as *gasp* other people. Sure, it's call forgery and is rather illegal. But it's possible. All, I'm saying, is that when Gerard goes to Starbucks, buys 5 Lite Green Tea Frappacinos, pays with his credit card, signs his receipt (as is customary is most western countries) and BAM you have Cajun linguini. NO. Just kidding. I meant, BAM you have a autograph.
And do you know how many little chillins scan autographs into their computers and post them on the internet? Answer: 94565469.4 Basically, all I'm trying to say, is that autographs are easily forged. I remember, when I was in Disney Land (World), way back when I was still a naive fetus (too short to ride Space Mountain...not much has changed), I remember meeting all the famous characters. I was about three apples high (as is customary in most western countries) running around with this stupid red autograph collecting book. Needless to say, I was pretty siked. But alas, my dreams were dashed, as I noticed that the characters were not authentically signing my book, but rather stamping it. STAMPING IT. Now, okay, I forgave the Ninja Turtles, because obvs they cannot hold a pen, as they are turtles. But, I mean, Jasmine, come on! What a skank!
I think, what I'm trying to get at, is that next time you see Gerard Way, you should probs punch him in the face and steal his credit cards. Or, conversely, ask for a picture with him, because, the photograph is proof (I know you know). Additionally, if you happen to see any one of the Ninja Turtles, I would appreciate it if you called me or at least sent a txt message.
Okay, now let's not talk about this again, or the fallacies in this argument.
posted by Panduh at 6:12 PM
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